How to Take a Vacation Without Stressing Out

Hi, there listeners. Welcome to Episode 88 of Faithful on the Clock, where every potato chip goes crunch to get your faith and work aligned. I’m Wanda Thibodeaux, your host for the next 10 to 15 minutes, and on today’s show, we’re talking vacations. We all wanna take ‘em, but for a lot of people, vacations actually bring a lot of stress. So, if the idea of taking a couple of days off revs up that quivery feeling in the pit of your stomach, hang with me, because I’ve got some pointers on how to ensure your vacation brings you the recuperation you actually need and deserve. Let’s go.

OK, everybody. We all know that vacations are supposed to be a time to get some rest, you know, just take a breather and enjoy life a little more. But a lot of the time, that’s just not what happens. There was a survey of 2,000 Americans in 2022 that found that two out of three people feel too much pressure on their trip to actually enjoy it. And that study found that there was a lot of money worries and FOMO attached to that. You know, people worried they wouldn’t have enough money or see everything they wanted to see. And all of that means that for a typical vacation of a week, people aren’t really able to relax until about three days into the trip. But I’m sure a lot of you out there can relate that there’s a lot of anxiety about being able to catch up. You know, we worry that we’re missing something important at work or that we’re not going to be able to handle the barrage of emails and everything that’s going to hit us when we get back. So, that makes it hard for people to really unplug. And then of course, for some people, there can be weird family dynamics going on, and sometimes the travel itself is stressful, right? Like, your flight gets delayed or there are problems with the hotel and whatnot. And if you’ve got kids, that just adds a whole new layer to the chaos. So, I just want to acknowledge all of that, because I don’t think it’s like — I think people wanna take vacations, they just don’t know how to find good solutions for all of these things so their brains and bodies can finally downshift. So let’s get right into the tips for how to get some of this stress out of the way.

So, the first thing, there was a study that showed that 40 percent of men and 46 percent of women, the reason they don’t want to take vacations is because they get caught up thinking about the mountain of work that’s gonna be there for them when they come back. So, what I want to recommend is that you get together with your boss or your team and you talk about the week before you’re gone, the week you’ll be gone, and the week after you come back. Because what happens a lot is that somebody, you know, they put in for the time off, it’s on the calendar and everything, but nobody makes a gameplan for how to transition in or out of that time. And the boss expects the person who’s gone on vacation to just jump right back in. And you know, you can’t do that. You’ve got a whole week of material or meetings to catch up on. So, I think it’s important to have that discussion so that you and your boss or your team can be realistic about what you’re gonna be able to deliver and what you need to get back up to speed. So, that week before you go, you know, there needs to be some time where you coordinate with others you need to delegate to, or you start really communicating and making it clear that you won’t be available. I think you have to do that and set your boundaries early, because otherwise, that’s where you get people texting you when you’re on the beach wanting to know what some password is or whatever, or they ask you to hop on a meeting you never agreed to be at. And just be really clear, right? Like, maybe texts are OK, but only after a certain hour of the day. But you have your responses ready, and you try to get everybody agreed on how that time should look. And you come up with a game plan about how to whittle down the work that’s gonna pile up, and you really identify clearly what the top priorities need to be. You figure that out ahead of time so that you’re not trying to problem solve about it during the actual vacation. And one verse to lean on here is 1 Corinthians 14:40, which says, “But all things should be done decently and in order.” There has to be some planning and rhyme and reason to things, not just to get a good result, but so that people aren’t disrespecting each other. And I’ll add James 3:18 to that, which says, “And a harvest of righteousness is sown in peace by those who make peace.” And I add that because I think it’s important to understand that a lot of the time, anxiety, conflicts, those things happen because we don’t intentionally go to each other in peace to work together. So head off that conflict right away. Plan it out and get those expectations set with those around you before you even pack your bag. And this planning and conversation can start earlier than you might think — there are experts who recommend you get started a full month before your vacation.

Now, here’s the caveat or balance to that, which is the second recommendation. Make sure that you are leaving room on your vacation for some spontaneity. Because even though we need a framework to work in, a little bit of spontaneity, that’s often what’s most memorable in your time off. That’s what lets us feel free. But what happens a lot, and I think this ties to this whole message we have now of needing to maximize every little thing, what happens is we feel like we have to dictate every minute off or we’re somehow not making the most of the vacation. Or sometimes, you know, you go back to visit family, and before you know it, they’ve kind of dictated to you when everybody can meet, and you end up working around everybody else, and even though you might love people, it’s just, you know, you’re not in control of any of it anymore. So, then we stress out because we’ve always got one eye on the itinerary. We’re always worried about how to squeeze in more. So, leave yourself some blocks of time where you don’t have anything specific to do. I think that’s important. And I think of Zacchius in Luke 19, you know, he initially set out just to get a glimpse of Jesus. But Jesus was like, nope, come on down out of the tree you’re in, because I’m gonna go to your house today. Probably wasn’t what Zacchius had planned, but I hardly think he regretted it.

Then thirdly, don’t forget your details. A lot of the stress around vacations comes with not feeling safe or not knowing how you’ll navigate problems in the new location. There was a study published in Harvard Business Review that found that 74 percent of people see figuring out the details as the most stressful. They worry about figuring things out during the trip. So, do your homework. Find out what services are around to help you. Maybe book a guide if you can afford it, or connect with someone in the area who can answer questions you might have. If you know where to go and you know you have somebody who can get you over the bumps you might run into, you probably won’t worry as much.

Fourth, and I know some of you might travel on your own, and that’s just fine. But if you’re traveling with other people, make sure you have a fair balance of power. And I’ll give you an example to show what I mean. So, when my kids were little, we’d go visit my in-laws. And I’m admittedly a lot more Type A than my husband. Add to that the fact that I’m the mom, and I ended up handling a lot of the logistics, probably 95 percent of the time. So, my vacations weren’t relaxing, because I’m trying to oversee this and that for the kids and whatnot, and my husband was focused mainly on just visiting his family. So, whether it’s talking about wives and husbands or masters and servants, the Bible does have this concept of fairness and respectful reciprocity in relationship, right? Galatians 6, verses 2 and 5 are good verses about our individual and social responsibility, too. We’re supposed to carry what we can but also help each other out when the load gets too heavy. So, before you head out the door, again, just have those conversations about what everyone is responsible for and what they’re not. Because otherwise, people get to the vacation, they wanna relax, and then when they can’t, they get resentful really fast.

The last tip I wanna give you is to practice relaxation before you take your time off. And I know you might roll your eyes a little on this one, but here’s my logic, okay? Your brain and your body, everything gets habitualized to what your behaviors are. So, if your habit is to be going, going, going all the time, do you really think it’s gonna be easy to chill out when your vacation comes along? Not even close. You’re gonna be sitting there itching to keep that momentum going that you’re used to. You’re gonna sit out there on that beach or whatever and feel like a bomb is just ticking away, like something just isn’t right. Because you’re in a circumstance you haven’t conditioned yourself for. You haven’t taught your nervous system how to cool off for a while. So, for at least a couple of weeks before your vacation, just start doing things that really are enjoyable and relaxing for you. That could be listening to music, going for a walk, whatever floats your boat, but set aside time every single day where you remind yourself what it’s like to not be rushed or have something pressing to do. And I can tell you, when you first start this, it’s gonna be really hard. Because the habit with most people, I think, because of the way our culture pushes us to get right into the next thing all the time, it’s hard not to look for something to occupy our time. It’s hard to accept that we don’t have to be working on something. But I just wanna encourage you, and I’ve reminded you on this show before, but if you look at Genesis, even God hit pause. Between every day, He took a little time to look at what He’d accomplished. He didn’t immediately go right into the next set of things He wanted to make. So, just realize that, no matter what the world might be telling you, it’s okay to slow down and not have anything on the agenda. Because slowing down once in a while, just letting your mind be free, that’s actually putting fuel in your tank for when you do need to be pushing forward.

So, those are my top five recommendations for how to keep stress from ruining your vacations. As a little bonus, I’ll just say, you know, this world is tough. And I don’t want you to ever feel like, because you need a break, there’s something wrong with you or that you’re weak somehow. That is totally not the case, okay? You’re just human. And you know, even Jesus, when He was out in His ministry, He’d sometimes take a break. He knew He couldn’t keep going if He didn’t refill His tank. And when He left His followers, you know, He wasn’t abandoning them. He was going back to God, because every core of His being craved intimacy with the Father, because He needed to reconnect to that to serve God and His followers well. So, please accept that there’s nothing wrong with stepping back for a little while, not just to rest and prepare for what’s coming, but so that you have time, just like God did in Genesis, to reflect on everything He’s done and absorb it. Because when you do that, I promise you, your appreciation and love for Him is only gonna get deeper, and you’re only gonna feel more secure in Him at the end of the day.

So, let’s stop there and pray.

Lord, even before we had to leave Eden, you designed us for good work. We were meant to be stewards of everything you made on this Earth. But we were not designed to work with no rest, and all too often, Lord, we work for the very things that grieve Your heart. So, Lord, I pray for everyone listening that You’ll help them hit pause, that You’ll let them set aside all the busyness of the world and take time to rest in You. And when they book those vacations, Lord, let everything go smoothly, so that they can really understand what it’s like to be at peace. In Jesus’ name, I pray. Amen.

That’s the show, everybody. I hope you’re inspired to finally use those vacation days — I know at least here in the United States, we tend to be scared to use them. But use them up, okay? They really are good for you. For our next episode in two weeks, since we’re about to hit a new calendar year, I’m gonna be talking about how to commit to continuous, year-long change. If you haven’t already done it, subscribe to the show to make sure you’re notified when that episode goes live. Until next time, everybody, be blessed.